More art coming soon, I promise, big landscapes and things. Lots of colors!

Scott

Yeah, I'm back, that's, I'm here. With drawings. Lots of drawings. On my computer. Which has a working scanner. Okay, they aren't "finished", there technically plans for sculptures and watercolors, but there pretty damn polished plans rendered in pen (well most of 'em are, some are half-assed). Oh, you'll notice, they look a little different. I've been trying differant styles and new pens out. New subjects, centering around sex, robots and monsters. Fun stuff. So go look at them...now.

PS - I'm listening to my John Lennon mix right now. Let me tell you, that guy was the fucking shit. If your one of those kids who think all the Beatles did was write a bunch of silly love songs, you've been listening to too much radio - and don't even get me started on that Beatles 1 cd. If absent from your collection, immediatley download the following. Immediatley. Report promptly after experiencing the awesome wrap around you like a mean shot of heroin for further instruction.

Strawberry Fields Forever (The Anthology 2 demo version!! )
Revolution 2 (AKA "the single version")
Come Together
She Said, She Said
Happiness Is A Warm Gun
I'm Only Sleeping
Tommarow Never Knows
Julia
In My Life

For not posting my art on this site, God has punished me by having my computer stolen. I have not only lost most of the original copies of the art on this site, but have several unposted, unbacked up drawings that will never see the light of day and are lost forever, including an epic sized MS Paint illustration. I am a truly sad Panda.

Although, without a computer handy, I am in fact drawing with ink again, going crazy with details. I'm also experimenting in different styles, having oodles of fun. I also have a massive collection of life drawings taken from French post cards too large to scan. I think I very well might have found my calling in pin-up art.

Adult Swim is on now, I'm going to go draw. Peace.

Scott feeling slightly better. Scott has new lady friend. Scott has a new cold thanks to new lady friend. Scott has many "new" pictures as well, although they're really just old pictures that Scott's been too angry at to post. But Scott feeling better today, so he post them. Scott also has a *gasp* furry picture.... yeah, I sold out harcore.

First of all, if anyone took the time to read my last journal entry, I apologize for being trite and naive. What I said was true, I believe every word of it, but it all seems so silly and embarrassing. I haven’t updated in a long time because I haven’t been drawing very much. I've spent most of my time wondering whether or not I'm making a huge personal and financial mistake by going to college for video games; wondering if I'll ever be content with my decisions. Am I being practical, or am I selling out? There are all sorts of ideas floating in my head, and every time I make a decision on which one to follow I'm spending thousands of dollars and getting very little done. I have two pictures to show for the past several months, one I'm greatly disappointed with, and the other I'm endlessly tweaking (ironically, it's of a tweaker). I've also planned several clever video games; maybe they'll actually be made.

I believe the game industry is Mars, for there are no women here. There is not a single female in my class, and only two in the whole program. The other fields taught in my building are computer tech and animation. Graphic design is taught on the other end of the campus and features a small pocket of women, but they are either uninteresting or unavailable. This has left me feeling a bit lonely to say the least. I've always dated women that I know, from school, work etc. I've never been good at dating strangers; random women from the super-market or the mall. Now I have to relearn my whole approach to meeting women; I feel like I'm in high school.

This has all left me a bumbling mess, I constantly feel like there's something missing in my life. I've always had a secure relationship and a clear picture of what I want to do with my life. My head was filled with fantastic visions and heart was warmed by loving embraces. Now, suddenly the future is a blank slate, reality seems cold and disappointing, and I find very few reasons to get out of bed in the morning. It isn't the blank canvas of possibilities, the invitation to adventure that it should be. Whenever I open my mouth to classmates it's either something cutting and rude, or just inane because I'm so disorientated all the time, and I feel the song “Creep” playing in my head everywhere I go. While "Am I Just a Drawing" was sarcastic, I feel like its becoming reality. Hm, "reality", how I ironic.

I suppose I should just clamp down, and actually follow through with something (my school). Maybe the things I wanted to do with art I can find in video games. Maybe after making some achievements in the gaming field I could find the money and time for my other passions. Maybe I could find a way to meet women. Maybe this is just a lull in my life I have to endure to get the things I want. However, this is easier said than done, and my spirit and energy to endure is waning.

I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo.
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here,
I don't belong here.